DIVERSITY AND TOLERANCE FOR CHILDREN & YOUTH

Prepared by: Rita Straub, M.S.,C.F.C.S.
Family Living Agent, University of Wisconsin Extension-Cooperative Extension

The United States has a long-standing tradition of diversity. Children and youth of today and future generations will need to live and work in an even more diverse society. We need to celebrate our differences and enable others to live full rich lives while recognizing the humanity of all people.

Traits or life skills that children and youth of today need to develop are: caring, responsibility, trustworthiness, fairness, and citizenship. These traits or skills will be necessary and need to be learned from parents and adults today so they will be prepared for their future adult roles.

Parents and adults can encourage tolerance in daily living without realizing it. Tolerance is learned "bit by bit" throughout childhood. Encourage children to share their thoughts and feelings about a situation and how their feeling may change if they were the person in the opposite situation. This is commonly referred to as "walking in someone else's shoes" for a time.

Opportunities for children to learn to be caring are most strongly taught parent and adult behavior along with verbal messages to enforce the behavior. Treating others, as you want to be treated teaches caring in a simple easy to understand manner to even the youngest child.

Look before you leap or think before you act, take responsibility for your actions, set a positive example, complete work you agreed to do, don't loose your temper, be a good sport, and return anything borrowed all result in learning responsible behavior. It is difficult and challenging when we need to work and live with those who are not responsible.

Trustworthiness is standing up for what you believe, be honest, show commitment, keep promises, don't ask people to do something you know is wrong and provide support to family, friends and others who are trustworthy. A real sense of security occurs in children and others when they know who they know is trustworthy or "the reliable one."

Listening to others, playing by the rules, not cheating, and treating others fairly teaches fairness. Everyone has a right to being treated fairly regardless of status in life.

Respecting authority, protecting the environment and doing volunteer work in the community teach citizenship. Many schools and youth organizations recognize citizenship by giving awards and special recognition.

Suggestions for parents to encourage tolerance can begin at home by talking about differences in a positive way. The level of self-esteem in child helps see the positive in others. Allow children and youth to express their feeling and ask questions in a civilized manner.

As a parent, don't tolerate inappropriate behavior or language. Any distasteful jokes about race, creed, gender, culture, disability, sex or sexual orientation, economic status, or other uniqueness should not be allowed. The "teachable moment" should take place as soon as appropriate based on age of child and situation.

As Albert Schweitzer said: "Children learn by three ways: Example, Example, Example. Recognize that no human is perfect and we all make mistakes but we can also try to and change our behavior.

Encourage family activities and events that provide opportunities to learn about different cultures and differences. Children are curious and especially in their early years they are willing to try new experiences. Cultural competence is the new term for inclusiveness.

For more information on this topic or other family living topics contact me at 715-261-1242 or  e-mail me rita.straub@ces.uwex.edu  

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