Sensitivity/Respect

Infants

What We Saw: The teacher picks up an infant as he awakens, saying "You're pretty soaking wet." The baby smiles. Looking in his face the teacherr says, "Pretty smiles." As she changes his diaper she mimics the vocalizations he makes. When she is finished she holds him up at her eye level and actively snuggles and kisses him. He looks away. She picks up his cue, slows her pace and moves her face close to his. He smiles and grabs her hair.

What It Means: It would be so easy to treat diapering as just another clean-up job, like mopping the floor. And that's just what you see in low quality programs. But in high quality programs, like this one, diapering is an important time for giving individual attention and encouraging verbal skills. This teacher took advantage of the opportunity to talk with the baby and wait for him to vocalize back. In this way she was giving him a chance to practice the give and take of conversation. When she engaged him in more active play than he wanted he gave her this feedback by looking away. She immediately responded to his cue by slowing down her pace. He let her know he was comfortable again by smiling and reaching for her hair. Her respectful response teaches him that others will be respectful if he communicates his discomfort.

Toddlers

What We Saw: The teacher sits on the floor by a group of children. A child comes to her with a hat over her face. She says, "Where's ?" and the child pulls the hat off her face and grins. Another toddler comes over holding a hat and holds it out to the teacher. She asks, "Do you want me to help you put the hat on?" She puts it on the child and tells her to look in the mirror. The child walks over and sees herself in the mirror, reaching out to touch her reflection.

What It Means: This interaction illustrates what Magda Gerber calls the 3 R's of interacting with babies: being respectful, responsive and reciprocal. The teacher makes herself available to the children, but waits for them to come to her to initiate an interaction. When the child comes to the teacher with her face hidden (a cue to play the game, which is a variation of peek-a-boo), the teacher reciprocates appropriately. She respectfully asks the child if she wants help with the hat, instead of assuming to know the child's intention. She then suggests a further expansion of the experience, looking in the mirror to see the results.

Preschoolers

What We Saw: The children are getting dressed to play outside and a girl is told she will not be able to play on the slide because she doesn't have snowpants. She cries loudly, "But I want to play outside, I want to slide!" She protests loudly and goes to the teacher, who holds her around the shoulders and tells her to calm down. The teacher says, "I know you want to play outside. I know you want to slide, but you will get all wet without snowpants. Calm down and we'll think of something." The girl quiets down and waits, as the teachers discuss where to find extra snowpants.

What It Means: This child has strong reactions to frustration, and the teacher's quiet yet firm tone of voice and physical contact help to reassure and calm her. The teacher succeeds in calming the girl because she acknowledges her feelings and desires. By meeting the girl where she was, in the emotion, the teacher was able to defuse her outburst and begin to reason with her. The child felt her distress was acknowledged and understood, and thus more able to negotiate a successful resolution. Physical play and outdoor activities are often an important outlet for children with intense personalities.

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